Posted: Wednesday 24th December 2014
So let’s open that door, let’s see what is hidden. Domestic abuse. Rape, there is no excuse.
At the time I had no idea it was rape. We were married, that was my duty as his wife, right? He was often angry at me for doing the wrong thing, making a cup of coffee not right, asking him to get out the shower as I needed to get ready, I did not giving him enough time to have the long shower he wanted, I made him unhappy so the least I could do was give him sex when he wanted it, right? He might go and have sex with someone else as he suggested he might, so I have to have sex with him, right? When he had sex with me, he would go on with his day thinking everything was fine, so it was fine, right?
Wrong, so very wrong. Just because you are married or in a partnership, does not give the other person the right to your body. It should be a pleasure that you are at one together, not a chore or something which you have to do. Is their intent for themselves? Is this part of the power and control over another part of your life? My dear, you are important, you are not merely an object, you are a beautiful woman, who has every right to be happy, and certainly it is not your job to make another adult happy. They are responsible for themselves. You can change this, you do have inner strength, even on those difficult days, you have that strength. Make a stand, you can do this, the police will BELIEVE you. It is NOT okay, there is NEVER any excuse.
You are important. Fact.
You deserve to be happy. Fact.
You have every strength to go from a victim to a survivor. Fact.
Lots of love, from someone who knows, it gets easier, I promise.